Better Luck Next Time
by Dr.Olga
Summary: Shepard and Aria discuss her past.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

"Better luck next time," said Aria, her customary smirk firmly in place as she sat back down, looking out into the crowds below.

_Better luck next time. _Shepard heard a gravelly voice say those words in her head._ Wrex._ _But why does that have anything to do with Aria?_

Being dead for two years hadn't helped her memory. She remembered all of the important things – like sentient machines bent on galaxy-wide destruction (and she wished she could forget that) - but personal stuff was hazy, which frustrated her to no end. As much as the Lazarus cell had tried, she had not come back completely whole.

_Better luck next time,_ the voice taunted her.

Yeah, she wished she had better luck with her memory.

Shepard did remember a painfully slow elevator ride down to the garage on the original _Normandy_ where most of her crew was stationed. She would talk to all of them, one at a time. Wrex would stand against the wall in the shadows and clean his gun, pretending not to eavesdrop on the conversations.

When she got to him, he didn't talk much. Then again, he was a Krogan. Various grunting noises made up a good chunk of his vocabulary. He wasn't really interested in talking about the genophage, but he didn't mind sharing his war stories –

_War stories. Wrex fought an asari, a commando, that used to be his friend –_

_Aria said that wasn't the first Krogan she'd pissed off._

_Wrex had gotten a note after he blew the merc base they fought in._

"The note said '_Better luck next time,'"_ she whispered, momentarily forgetting where she was.

The asari's head snapped back toward her, voice low as she asked, "What did you say, Shepard?"

The commander held her gaze. _'Sometimes you'd rather disappear than be forced to kill someone,' _Aria had said. She hadn't been able to fully hide her remorseful expression. And seeing it flash across her face for a split second was more than enough for Shepard to throw caution to the wind when dealing with the queen of Omega and satisfy her curiosity.

"Aleena," she blurted out.

She had to give credit where it was due. T'loak had barely raised her eyebrows in shock before she recovered. "I don't know anyone important on Omega that goes by that name," she said in a clipped, icy tone. "If there was such a person, I'd have heard. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other business to attend to."

Shepard didn't buy any of that for a second. She didn't budge from her seat. "You said you'd been a mercenary," she said. A smirk to replace the one that had since disappeared from Aria's face had found a place on her lips. "Does the name Urdnot Wrex mean anything to you?"

* * *

I'd read the Mass Effect wiki about the speculation surrounding Aria being Aleena, and thought it was really cool. Let me know what you think :)

To be continued.


	2. Chapter 2

Onto part 2!

* * *

Aria looked at her bodyguards. "Leave. _Now_."

Quickly escaping to the bar below, they left the commander alone with their queen, who looked like she was ready to biotically throw the human across the room.

"I thought we went over this, but it seems you're determined to break the _only_ rule on Omega."

Shepard raised a hand in a placating gesture. "I'm not here to fuck with you, Aria." She gestured to her head. "I'm just trying to fill in the gaps I'm missing."

The asari's voice was so sharp it could have cut steel. "Your dull memory is a concern. I'm surprised you lived as long as you did in your first life. Couple that detriment with your curiosity and your penchant for pissing off dangerous people, and you have yourself a death wish on this station. I thought you would've tried to avoid that scenario again. Apparently they resurrected an idiot."

Shepard didn't respond, just sat and waited. The ball was in the other woman's court, and she waited to see what she'd get served.

Aria paused for a long minute as she sat back on her couch and tried to decide what to do with the problematic individual in front of her. "Tell me everything you know Commander."

"What do I get in return?"

"I'll let you walk out of here."

"I'd like to see you try and stop me."

"Oh, I'm sure the fight would be long and bloody, but I'd win in the end. I have hundreds of years of experience, and you don't have your lackeys to back you up."

Shepard was getting tired of the banter. She had a mission to complete. "Look, I can't remember all of what Wrex said. I just know you two used to be allies, and then fought each other. Afterward, you sent him the note I mentioned."

There was another pause as Aria stared at the human, then spoke in a much lighter tone. "Hmm. Well, unfortunately, that's not good enough. Just because you can't remember it now doesn't mean you won't later. I'm not willing to risk that information being leaked."

"So where does this put us then? Because if I have to fight my way out of this club, I will."

Aria raised an eyebrow and smirked as she stood up to approach the commander. "No, I won't be killing you today. As much as I'd like to." she mentioned, almost as an afterthought. "There are other ways of finding out what you know. And once I do, I'll make a decision."

Shepard's thoughts immediately went to torture, but quickly dismissed the idea. Both she and Aria knew that wouldn't work. The soldier was too strong for that. So if death threats and torture were off the table, what exactly did the asari have in mind?

She was almost afraid to know. "And what exactly are you proposing?" she asked, a wary expression on her face.

Aria's smirk turned into a wicked grin. "Are you familiar with joining minds, Commander?"

* * *

They had moved into a room in the VIP section of the club for some privacy. Shepard had informed Aria that she was familiar with the practice, as she had done so with Liara T'Soni on her first round of saving the galaxy.

They were standing close, opposite each other, with Shepard looking very uncomfortable and T'Loak looking like she enjoyed the soldier's discomfort.

"How can you see my memories if I can't even remember them?"

"Your memories are locked in your subconscious. You might not know where they are, but I can find them."

Shepard grimaced. "I'd almost prefer a fight than you roaming around in my head."

"Too late, Commander. You should've kept your mouth shut. I believe the expression you humans use fits this occasion perfectly: 'Curiosity killed the cat,'" said Aria, a mocking amusement lacing her tone.

The soldier regretted ever opening her mouth. "Yeah, and hindsight's 20-20."

"If you want to screw with me, you have to deal with the consequences."

Shepard sighed heavily, wrenching her eyes shut and clenching her fists together. "Just get it over with."

Aria grinned. She was going to enjoy this. "Embrace eternity!"


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sorry I've taken so long to update – my second round of midterms got in the way.

Note: I'm taking some liberties with the joining process and some of the dialogue from the first game (I don't have it to reference off of right now), so I'm sorry if it's not completely canon.

I'm not a big fan of how this turned out, but I hope you enjoy it all the same :) Let me know if you see anything that needs to be fixed.

* * *

Aria neglected to tell the commander just how different this experience would be from the joining with the young asari doctor. T'Soni had been looking for something that had been in the forefront of Shepard's mind, something easily found and shared.

T'Loak would have to do a little digging to find what she wanted - not that she minded. Maybe she'd take a little longer than she needed and uncover a few of the commander's secrets. Nothing worked so well against a possible enemy like having potentially threatening (or embarrassing) intel on them. _Maybe then we'll be even, Shepard. _

Of course, the bond worked both ways, but the human was at a disadvantage. Having someone root around in the deepest parts of your mind was mentally incapacitating, and especially so for someone with little experience. Shepard wouldn't be able to do much while she was in there, so she was basically at the asari's mercy.

Once enveloped in Shepard's unconscious, she took a few moments to simply feel the mind around her. Aria had always felt the mind was akin to something like a library – memories and feelings from almost every moment in a person's lifetime were stored there, waiting to be remembered.

Shepard felt almost..._claustrophobic _to the asari. She was used to joining with members of her own species; was familiar with the open and vast depths of minds that were centuries old. Asari minds were also more structured than humans - they tended to compartmentalize most of their memories, order them in specific sequences for easy retrieval if need be. This was not a conscious act, but rather one that had co-evolved along with the bonding process. But this human mind felt cramped and cluttered, with every memory stored in an arbitrary order, so it would be harder to find what she wanted quickly.

But before she went searching for her goal, she thought she'd have a little fun first. She formed a small tendril of biotic energy and cast it out amongst the memories. As it moved along, Aria thought of topics of interest and then waited as the related images were supplied by Shepard's mind.

_I want to see the famed commander in action_. 'Assault at Elysium,' she thought.

She wasn't disappointed. A multitude of past experiences assailed her –

-_she gripped her pistol tighter as she ran out from behind cover, shooting with her right hand at a slaver as she threw a biotic warp with her left at another, trying to protect the children behind her-_

_-ducking behind a wall as she threw a grenade around the corner, then removing the shotgun from the corpse of a dead soldier and blasting anything left standing-_

_-the fear and rush of adrenaline she felt as she took down three batarians in hand-to-hand combat when she ran out of ammo-_

Aria didn't need to see anymore. _That was quite impressive_. She started to feel a grudging respect toward the human's battle prowess. _Had we decided to fight, it would've rivaled my encounters with Wrex and Patriarch. _

She moved on, exploring other subjects. She had few memories of friends – most centered on her quarian and turian companions, with a few scattered thoughts of her doctor and pilot. The topic of family brought up pictures of the slums on Earth-

_-other orphans huddled with her in the abandoned apartment, soiled clothing hanging off their emaciated bodies, moaning because they had no food to eat-_

It reminded Aria of life on Omega: harsh, lonely and dangerous. _Her whole life seems to be like that,_ she mused.

The thought of childhood brought forth many violent memories, and more often than not Shepard either committed the acts of cruelty herself, or was a bystander to them, which surprised her. _She acts so righteous now, she could give that Christ figure humans are always talking about a run for his money.__  
_

The human was becoming more interesting by the minute._ What made her change from such a renegade into a paragon of virtue? How is she so compassionate and empathetic one instant, and then become a hardened killer the next?  
_

There were many different sides to Shepard. She was a mystery that was very hard to unravel - which was okay with the asari. Aria loved a challenge. _I'll figure you out eventually._

_But for now, time to look at something a little more...fascinating._ 'Romantic interests.'

Images swiftly appeared, although they weren't as scandalous as she'd hoped they'd be-

-_she held her tightly as Liara broke down and wept for her mother-_

_-the look of regret that lingered on Samara's face as she left her in the room, alone-_

_-there was a smirk on the indigo-toned asari's face as she turned around and proclaimed "I am Omega!"-_

She paused at the last image. That was a _very_ interesting development._ Well, well, commander. I'm intrigued._ She went to continue on when she felt Shepard starting to twitch slightly in discomfort. She had assumed as much would happen– most humans didn't handle long periods of time in the bonding process very well, as their minds weren't naturally built to be shared with others. But the soldier seemed to be having trouble sooner than she'd expected. She would have to finish her search quickly, in order not to cause Shepard any lasting problems.

As she thought 'Wrex', she stretched the energy out a little farther -

-_she saw a Krogan standing in a dark corner, with a scarred face and a red crest-_

That was Wrex. She latched onto the memory and watched.

_She stepped closer to the Battlemaster and spoke. "Wrex."_

"_Shepard."_

"_Got any more war stories?"_

"_If you want stories, talk to the quarian."_

"_I'd rather hear one from you."_

"_Well, there was this one job a while back..."_

Aria watched as he told Shepard about her past life. Aleena had been a close comrade, but when he took a contract that turned out to be for her, they'd agreed to fight out of respect for one another's abilities. She smiled when he said it'd been the toughest fight of his life._ Wrex, you sound almost nostalgic - for a Krogan. You're getting soft. _

The memory ended shortly after. Aria felt a bit relieved. The only other person who knew she'd survived besides Wrex and Shepard was the volus who'd put the contract on her, and he was long dead. So, as long as the krogan never came to Afterlife, and the human could keep her mouth shut, nothing would be exposed – and she wouldn't have to kill anybody.

She began to retract her biotic web and leave when Shepard's mind finally fell out of control; the human no longer being able to withstand the foreign presence in her subconscious as random segments of memories bombarded the asari –

_-the fear that he'd die as she frantically tried to stop the bleeding while he lay there torn apart by the helicopter's bullets-_

_-the mix of pride and humility she felt as she was named the first human Spectre- _

-_the anguish was overwhelming as she watched the nuclear explosion destroy Virmire, and Kaidan along with it-_

The commander moaned at this memory and started to tremble uncontrollably. Aria knew if she didn't get out soon, the injury done would be irreversible. She withdrew the probe more quickly-

-_she struggled for every breath as her lungs collapsed, heart pounding as it tried to send oxygenated blood she didn't have through her body-_

Aria cringed as Shepard's suffering reverberated through the bond when she cried out at the last image. The soldier then decided she'd had enough of the painful flashbacks. With every last bit of mental energy she could muster, Shepard ripped the tendril out of her mind – and screamed as her head exploded in fiery agony.

She could take no more. She was unconscious before she hit the ground, collapsing at the asari's feet.


End file.
